About Me

“What do you want to be when you grow up?” Astronaut, police officer, nurse, ballet dancer? For me, it was always an unanswerable question. I still don’t know the answer!

What I did know was that I hated seeing the tired, miserable faces of people travelling to and from work during rush hour. The thought of being a 9 – 5er left me cold. 

So, at 19, with a few school qualifications, I found myself tired and miserable, going to work in rush hour – like most people.

At 22, I saw two police officers laughing one sunny Friday afternoon, and I knew I could do that for a living. Laughing! Anyone can do that, right? So I joined the police.

After 27 great, horrendous and sometimes amazing years, I had to retire due to ill health.

During that time, I’d worked with many cases of Domestic Violence. I worked on research projects. I worked on developing a Risk Assessment Tool that was rolled out across all UK police forces. I worked with perpetrators to help them understand and change. I worked with victims to help them escape.

What I saw and heard always shocked and saddened me. The discussions around me were often heated and passionate. I’ve read many wonderful and helpful books by people who have overcome their struggles.

But I couldn’t find anything that challenged abusive behaviour from the very beginning. The early stuff. The under the radar stuff. The stuff that comes disguised as “caring”. I thought I’d use my experience and knowledge to work on that! and that is how “Be Kind. No Excuses – a guide to help teenage girls recognise abusive behaviours in intimate relationships” was born.